So this is the final installment of a reflection on the Navy SEALS 8 parts to creating grit and resilience as they apply to the world of education. Today at my high school I found myself sharing some of this with my class. As I looked at the young people in my room and began asking questions that surround this topic, I realized that they didn’t really understand what the words meant. I asked how many have ever felt the feeling of failure and none had the courage to answer in the affirmative. I know that doesn’t mean they haven’t. Some are just hesitant to answer publicly, however, when I asked if they felt like they were being protected from failure, almost every hand in the room went up. True, I had to define the question a bit for them, but they felt protected nonetheless. One thing became apparent. Young people are up for the challenge. They hope for the opportunity to prove themselves. They want to feel expectations and try to rise to meet them. They want rigor. They want the possibility of failure looming. They want to strut their stuff. As educators, I believe we owe them the opportunity to succeed or not on their own merits. If at first they don’t succeed, we can be there to help them find their way next time. We can help them enhance both grit and determination. This installment revolves around the final three elements of training grit and resilience/determination: give help and get help, celebrate small wins, and find a way to laugh.
Give help and get help. Kids naturally do this…if you let them. Young people naturally want to help those that need it. Young people are more astute than adults at ascertaining who really needs help and who is feinting. Giving students the opportunity to help one another is a no-brainer as far as I am concerned. I have seen it and so have you. Students will help each other find success at all costs including “cheating.” Some teachers lose sight of why “cheating” may occur. The core reason is truly quite beautiful. Kids don’t see it as cheating, they see it as helping their friends or colleagues find success which is how it works in the world. There is no condoning of cheating in the purest form here. I know we have to assess learning on the individual level, but truly students want to give help to those who need it. The offering of help is something we as educators should encourage. Of course the other side of the coin is getting help. Not all people can accept help. The trick is to teach students when to give and when to get help. That help doesn’t always need to come from educators. The truth is that in the big picture, it doesn’t matter from where the help comes; it matters that the help is effective in assisting the student to overcome challenges. Step aside and let students help and get help how they see fit. We can assess on another day.
Celebrate small wins. A big goal can be measured in small parts. An old adage asks, “how do you eat an elephant?” The answer is one bite at a time. Help kids celebrate small wins. I watch this on the football field with one of my sons. After a good defensive stand or even one good defensive play, players high five or slap each other’s pads. They are celebrating small wins! Nothing major has happened. They may have stuffed a run or gotten an interception. These aren’t usually game winning plays but they are parts of a game winning opportunity. The same is true in a classroom. Small wins are worthy of celebration because they keep the morale of your students up and encourage them to keep trying to get the big win. Finding small reasons to celebrate can make all the difference on a bigger stage.
Finding a way to laugh. The last of the Navy SEAL elements of grit and determination is finding a way to laugh. Why is laughter important? The answer is simple. Laughter lightens the mood and helps us all deal with difficult times. Young people are under as much stress as adults oftentimes. Laughter is a great coping mechanism. We can relieve huge stress through laughter and it makes monumental changes in our attitudes. Why not let kids laugh. Some times it’s even okay if we throw in a few jokes to make them laugh, it will make the load seemed lightened and enable students to go on with their pursuits. Nothing we are doing in the classroom is life shattering. I think sometimes we over value what we do and that causes us to think that things like subject verb agreement are in fact life shattering. The truth is we can all use more laughter in our lives.
As we near closure on this topic, some things come to mind. Every student is cut from different cloth. We need them to possess grit and determination for our sake as we grow older. Let’s enable them to be tough. Let’s help them find fortitude in what we do. Let’s glory in those differences and thank God that not every student is the same. We, as teachers, can help all students succeed on their own merits with their own gifts in their own way. The fruit truly is ripe for the picking. The real question is whether you will allow that fruit to be picked or not.
